Wednesday, November 11, 2009

To begin with...

Well this has been a long time in coming, no matter how much I have fought against it. I, Bobbie Berendson, have joined the blogger community. (listens to the cries of horror and the pandemonium in the streets.) I have no idea just how to do this, so I will just spit it all out and see what happens.

I am an artist in the truest sense of the word. Everything in my life is touched by my creativity, I can't help it, it is just what I have always done. It has been a release for so many things in my life that I have had no control over: sexual abuse, family illnesses, my own illnesses and stumbling blocks, my genes, the list goes on. I credit my mother with much of my attitude, I usually face things with a smile and a considerable amount of faith. However, the issues in my life, especially my childhood, left me a lonely introvert.

I started drawing seriously in 7th grade. I also started writing around then too, I wanted to be a writer and though that didn't pan out I still have a wealth of tales to tell in my head. Art was more practical for me since I could aim for a scholarship in art to help me get into college. I had a lot of help and a wealth of wonderful teachers, from high school to UVSC to BYU. Unfortunately It turned out that I just wasn't a good enough artist at the time I finished my illustration program at BYU to get a job. It doesn't help that my talents fit better in the age of pulp magazines than they do in our modern world.

Due to the fact that no matter how much I looked and applied I could not get a job that I could do with my physical limitations as well as the fact that this silly art thing left me frustrated and strongly compelled to keep creating things; I dared open my own little internet shop in the spring of 2006. Metallic Visions was born.

Now days 2D art has become more of a hobby to me and I spend more time making my own kind of unique jewelry, masks, and sculpture than anything else. I like what I do, no I love it, I love creating things and this current venture of mine uses so many of my skills, which is a nice thing when you are a jack of all trades with not one mastered. I hate trying to sell them, it also doesn't help that I am clinically depressed and suffering from social anxiety bordering on agoraphobia. But I have learned in my life that the only person you can count on 100% is yourself and if I want people to see what I can do I will have to show them, even if I am terrified and it burns me out. Thus the creation, in part, of the blog.

So often I wish that I could be like so many other people and be satisfied with a regular job and a regular hobby. That is not for some of us, some of us are artists and come what may we must create. It is our duty, our curse, our gift, and our salvation, and at the end of the day I am grateful for it.

Now I just wish I could make a living with it.... heheheh

2 comments:

  1. I'm not sure how many people are really satisfied with a regular job. I know mine completely wipes me out, to the point that I had to develop new hobbies that have nothing to do with my job. Meaning, I do some much computer related stuff at work, that I don't have the energy to do computer related stuff that takes brain power at home. No more 3D modeling energy, no more Photo Shop energy. Sometimes I wish I had the guts to break out and have a non-conventional job and do what I really want to do.
    More power to you!

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  2. I saw your post on FB, so, I wondered on over to your blog. I love blogging, I love writing, and it really is a release for those of us that can't say stuff "out-loud." I have always adored you since we have met....your beautiful, inside and out; that is hard to find in some folks.

    I hope you don't mind me following your blog. I would love to learn more about you! Wonder on over to my blog if you have a minute...but I warn you it may bore you to smithers.

    Your a truly talented person!

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